Okay, this is going to be a very "unlike me" post. I'm going to try and not get defensive, be fair and calm, and spell out all sides of the story.

Wait, I just saw dad dancing becoz the PC has "jailhouse rock" playing. Awww :) {I use it more often when im aware someone doesn't like it. ahahahahaha. so much for an unlike me post}

Right I should get started. I will get straight to the point. None of you will ever here about Magnetron from now onwards. I have officially decided to not make him a part of my life. Let me begin by telling you what happened between us.. from the start. We were introduced, we flirted, he made me feel good after really long, his POA was more towards the "wham-bham-thankyou-ma'am" side, and mine was more towards conversation-leading-to-something-that-we-shall-not-spell-out-directly. Err, if you get me. The conflict of interest came out in the open. I drew a line. We decided to not go there, and continue to be friends/on talking terms. HA.

I kept telling everyone how I appreciated him being honest. I kept standing up for his blunt-ness. I have called him names many times, but I always did appreciate his being honest with me. Sometimes, he got a little too honest, and I put myself through that as well. Because you might think you know what you're doing, but in situation like these, sometimes you're not aware of the real line. When the attention stopped, I yearned for it. So the simple "flirted and didnt work out" relationship, became more complicated because... of hope. He had spelled it out for me. I still hoped he'd miraculously look at it the way I did.

He never stopped crossing the line, the same line I thought I had well defined within me. Apparently not. Because with time I learned to brush away his inisuations. Politely. And because I was so polite about it, he never stopped trying. Apparently on 1% men believe that a woman can flirt without wanting sex. Yeah, I know, SUCKS. Maybe, just maybe, she could be looking for good conversation.... *hold your breath* yes, that is it. Conversation.

So anyway, after the other experience I had with guys crossing their line, last night when he started talking similarly, I'd had enough. I didn't want to put myself to it. Unfortunately, I cannot articulate myself well in situations where Im not sure about how I feel. It took me till today morning to understand how I felt. So pugise handled it. (I love you with all my heart for doing that. You're the reason behind this firm decision that I've made. I swear I'd have screwed up without you. muah :))

Basically, we told him off. She him that enough was enough and that he'd talk to me only when we could have a conversation without him bringing up his favorite topic. And he says- "No can do"
So without passing ANY judgement, I decided that it was the end. I've had bitter self esteem issues in the past, but not bad enough to know I don't need t be a part of this mess. I understnd his want to talk about anything, hence there was n name calling. I just did not to pu myself through it anymore. Its over. I don't talk to him again. And I know I will. No weak moments, no detours.
And, Im fairly normal. The realisation has not made one bit of a difference to my life. I just am stronger, in terms of what I want and drawing a line. I'm quite proud of myself of making this decision. Its me: biggest succumb-er to forbidden fruit :) Its definitely going to help me make right decisions in the future.

Phew. Hasn't scarred me for life or anything, but I'm repulsed nonetheless. I think this is the beginning of my "I don't have time for a relationship" period. Well, bring it on :)

P.s- pugsie, I am very very thankful.
P.p.s- awww, Preeti, you think I'm cute :)
P.p.p.s- Next post will be very cynical and defensive, I promise. NO more growing up stuff! Even, I miss me already.