Don't stay, Don't go either.
Don't do anything... just be around.
Stay, that's all I'd want from you.

You're no more than a temporary want.
Albeit a very desirable one.
I'm not confused or messed up.
I'm just not clear on certain things.

You could go If you want.
Leave nothing behind.
Only go, If you're sure you'll never be back.


Okay, I don't write beautifully. But a few lines are enough to express. So Im not going to get embarrassed and not publish that. I wrote it impromptu and I want it to remain. I'm not looking for feedback, this doesn't classify as anything but a vent. Bleh. I realllly like David Archuletta from American Idol, there's something very inspiring about his voice. He's kind of corny, I know, and I prefer David Cook, and I'd want him to win, But Archuletta has the best vocals I've ever heard, hands down.

Anyway, Best friend came over yesterday. We took some very funny videos.... I don't think there's anyone who we've not poked fun at. My thighs are aching.... the pain is excruciating :( I started working out yesterday, and I knew this was going to happen.. Sigh I guess Its just the wrong time of the month. No reason for this crankiness. Im actually in an okay mood. Just being cranky aise hi.

I've realised that I've become much more comfortable with the way I look. Its nothing to do with my weight loss, but there are many pictures and videos that I took yesterday which made me look positively like a PIG, but It didn't really matter to me after a point. So thats progress I guess. I've realised after reading a few of my previous posts, that I was very confused about my sense of self, it wavered from time to time. Though now, I dont think I could chalk out specipfic adjectives, I'm sure about what I'm about.

Acha, this post is getting too pep-talk-ish for me to handle. I think i just need a vacation. Im waiting for end of this month, when I'll be off. I love Delhi, but I need to go away for sometime to recognise its worth.

One question- what kind of a feeling is it, to want to ONLY talk to that person, not bothering about what they do in their lives otherwise.. with absolutely no feeling of jealousy, or interest in what they do or say to other people, as long as I get to talk to them? Hating them on the extreme, and missing them everytime you hear or see somethin approriate.. and not being able to resist talking to them when you see them online, or when you recieve an SMS from them, inspite of knowing its a fucking dead end??

Okay that's a long question. I'm sure you get what I mean though. Please enlighten.