Friday, February 29, 2008

It took me four days.... but i finally did it. Finally had a fling. atleast thats what i'd like to believe it was... it was nerve wracking, made me feel good about myself... and four days later, when it didnt work out, im feeling even better trashing whatever happened. Its fun, these things! the only thing is sometimes friends dont understand the sentiment behind a fling. Some think i cant take it, some think im slotting myself to just that type when i apparently deserve more, and some sensible friends think im Gorgeous. Thats the kind of opinion im looking forward to hearing! hahaha. no what i mean is, when the situation is trivial, i dont expect people to bring in psychological reasons behind it. It started out with me being verrry demanding, but the more i found out about the situation, the more i adapted myself to it, and i know i can do that.

yes, ive been deprived for quite some time now.I know i deserve "monogamy" and i can understand why friends are concerned, but beeh. Its all in good fun. I love that i can see mysefl growing up by the day, and no matter what people think as good or bad, i know what im capable of and what i want. Right now, no matter how much i complain, its soooooooo much more fun being single and not having anyone to think of. yes, thats also fun, but it restricts you to extreme emotions only, and also restricts you to feeling just two things. extremely amazing, and extremely depressed esp for people like me who depend on the opposite sex for a healthy sense of self.

i know i derserve good, and very good. so lets wait, i think the more i pass through these loosers, the more i realize i dont need to prove myself to anyone. that's just immature.

"Shruti:.....gorgeous :D
you really are
todaay
esp

Swetha: :D

Shruti: when you came into namita ka class
the minute you entered
and waltzed in...
you stormed in
and i went
"ha"......

as long as i have friends who i forcibly ask to flatter me, i dont need anyone with a penis:D