Wednesday, October 27, 2010

I'm not a bad person.
Just fickle.


I have always been dreamy, like a small child with that little frilly doll on her mind. (Or action truck, whatever)

I am impulsive.
And I am romantic.
I fluctuate between being self critical and extremely lax.
But, don't we all?

And I have my fair share of irrational choices, honest interruptions and impulsively tainted decisions.
Just your average girl who runs through tunnels of emotions.

But you don't want these justifications.
You want to know why I make the same mistakes.
You only want to know why I am so complex.
It's simple. I try. I do wrong. I get beaten down. I learn. I implement.
I'm not a bad person.
I am just fickle.

I promise.
Maybe I need that sabbatical to Pondicherry afterall. Devoid of technology and a heart.
Maybe I can buy some stability?

5 comments:

Kristin said...

It's refreshing to read that someone else shares in my impulsivity, bad decision making and fickleness. You speak of it so matter of fact, like "This is me. Take it or leave it." You are accepting of yourself; your words are encouraging.

S said...

Haha, I'm so happy that what's came off from this piece. I actually wasn't firm on anything. It was more a defeated angst, where I mention how I cannot change even though I want to, maybe because I don't want to or maybe because it has become a pattern..

Glad to know it was encouraging to you!

Purple Cow said...

Where do they sell stability these days?

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