Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Have you ever stopped to wonder why the idea of a flaw is a negative one?

Can flaws be the binding factor between person to person? Or more so, can the idea of a flaw ever be accepted as a part of a person's personality?

I have often tried to fight away the negative connotations of the idea of a flaw. If a person around me has a flaw, ideally, I would like to accept it as something unique about that person. Now this is ideally. Nobody really follows that. It's easier to be judgmental. But when your own flaws set off to bite you from all corners, what do you do? Change it... because, it's not acceptable? To whom? As long as your flaws are acceptable to you, how does it matter, really?

I know, sometimes these ideas of individually can get a bit stale, but I always mention the word ideally. There a lot of things I would personally like to change about how our minds have been societally conditioned. And I fight classifications, stereotypes and conditioning almost everyday. Not only of the people around me, but mostly the ones I possess. It's the hardest to break your own standards and grow out of them, into new ones.

I just realized that the feeling of endearment is very powerful. When you genuinely care about someone, their flaws become more than acceptable, and you work your away around dealing with them. You strip them off their stereotypes, and love them wholeheartedly. Not unconditionally, always, but the feeling is very powerful nonetheless. And no amounts of cynicism, skepticism or negativity can subvert this. It becomes wise then, to embrace this feeling of being cared about and caring about people: your friends, companions and most importantly those relationships that you tend to question so often.

And in this moment of change, I need to remember for myself, that I have a very solid base, which even if it fades, will always hold it's own by virtue of the memories.

4 comments:

Vaudevillian said...

someone great once said others are a mirror of yourself. everything that'd shock you in others means there's work to be done.

Jinu P said...

Very well said. An ideal example of accepting with flaws is that of relationship with parents. Neither parents nor children are free of imperfections but the acceptance is a result of mutual love. Conditioning dictates the choices we make in life - about friends, partners etc. A vain thing that relates to this is physical appearance. People who are conventionally not attractive start looking very nice to us because over a period of time there attitudes have won over their looks. It is difficult to be non-judgmental and a whole lot of times we discard people with shortcomings whereas the same bunch of people are accepted gracefully by the rest.I think it is all a matter of what you can stand and what you cant. For ex., my best friend is a Casanova, is lazy and is rude. I know a whole bunch of people who dislike him. But not me and some more like me. Not because we do not think of those things as inappropriate but because our day-to-day interactions with him command much more from us than just getting clouded by these short comings.

I donno what point I am trying to make here, I wrote a rather long comment! :P ok i am just trying to echo what uve written in there!

Nice blog too :)

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