"I hate the way you talk to me,
And the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive me crazy.
I hate it when you stare.
I hate your horrible dressing sense,
And the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick.
It even makes me rhyme.
I hate it...I hate the way you're always right.
I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh;
Even worse when you make me cry.
I hate it when you're not around;
And the fact that you didn't call,
But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you;
Not even close;
Not even a little bit;
Not even at all."

this one's from the movie "10 things i hate about you".. it was a good movie, but this dialogue move me a lot. i was kinda worried about the whole, i'll never fall in love n the thing that happned with raghav will happen again phase, and im still not clear about it. but im fairly okay, considering i havent thought about it, n i generally dont think about it. that much evolution has happened.

i know it'll happen some day im just worried that even though that'll happen it'll take me a while to fall, FALL, for someone again. the thing with A is only there becoz he's ignoring me, not ebcoz i genuinely fell for him. i know that.

sigh, it is mighty pissing off anyway. im soooooooo irritated at him.
urgh i need to get laid.
i need attention from the opposite sex.
I NEED TO HAVE INTELLIGENT FLIRTING.

RAHUL doesnt count.
urgh.
i HATE this.

Went to sarojini today!! bought a cute top n a usual tshirt to wear to college n bought purple socks with donkeys on them! i think thats the best buy:):) okay i know i cant live with this anymore. im in generally a good mood today, but there r certain things that i dont like that r happening but they're out of bounds therefore i cant do anythin about.. bleh. im writing crap. i wish i could have night outs like the others. n i know that safety is the only issue. or else i would be out partying if things were better. im realllllllllllllyyy happy with my life now, n i was just telling anu that there's nothing i'd trade in my current situation. everythings good. not perfect but i can live with it.

i think by the day the thing i was talkng about, my popularity and acceptability issue is getting better. i can feel myslef gettting mature by the day. and im really happy that i have my future planned. im going to give mass entrances in and outside india n whatever happens i know will happen. n anu was telling em a few days ago, that its pointless to brood over things u know cant change becoz of genuine reasons behind it. i genuinely belive that someday i will have a gopod nightlife n i'll then look back at my college life n miss it. infact, dont even get me started about colleg life. its the best thign thats ever happened to me. i mean, school was fun n all, n i miss it terribly but i dont know what im going to do when i passout, i'll be crushed.

yest only i was passing the park n i saw these 9-10th ke bachche u know giggling n stuff. i wish i could go back in time now. i wish i could have a silly little crush n all of that. i miss my adolescent. im technically still a part of it, but its not the same. anyway, hopefully i'll get driving soon. n i dont wnt to talk abt zephyr, im in a good mood, someday when it gets to me (it already has but am in a good mood today dont want to spoil it.) i shall discuss it. we're gonna do another duet thsi yr hopefully, "its all coming back to me" me n aastha n i want to make sanam n everyone else's jaws drop open!

n about the men, ahem, im so much better now than i was before. have started talking to raghav, nothing like serious n stuff, just friends again. im happy the way things are, n im not willing to trade this life for a guy, n even incase AND WHEN i do find someone, i'll never wokr on it like i did for Raghav, whats going to happen, will. have started to love RHCP's songs!
adios!

"Getting born in the state of Mississippi
Papa was a copper and mama was a hippie
In Alabama she would swing a hammer
Price you gotta pay when you break the panorama
She never knew that there was anything more than poor
What in the world does your company take me for
Black bandana, sweet Louisiana robbin' all a bank in the state of Indiana
She's a runner, rebel and a stunner
On her merry way sayin;
baby whatcha gonna
Lookin' down the barrel of a hot metal 45
Just another way to survive
California rest in peaceSimultaneous release
California show your teeth
She's my priestess, I'm your priest
YEAH, YEAH"

copyright "RHCP"

again, as usual, im so late. i cant tell u how much thinking ive put in to finally write. i certainly need too. somehow the same feeling doesnt come when i wrtie on paper. i have exactly about 25 mins to finish venting out bcoz "desperate housewives" is starting at nine.

okay okay,. first things first, I WENT FOR A DUET!!! me n puii did "wild horses" n kept screwing up suring practices but on stage i didnt screw up at all, n though nobody told me, i thought my voice sounded very sexy! haha!

n i think ive majorly matured, considering bormy n this "unbreak my heart" guy are veryy cute, i just acknowleged the fact that they're cute n nothin else. n i wasnt the usual self. but seriously. i can totally understand why ahem, behaved that way during the fest, i wouldve had i been in the ninth grade or something(smirk smirk)

but yes, on the toher hand i also agree that the other side, was ebign a lil harsh. i mean harsh in the sense that i know it can get irritating but i dont think she understands how the other one owuld have felt bcoz she isnt feeling that way. only i wish she has done it a lil bit more esthetically. in the sense, sometimes i feel i come off as too forward to a new person, i know for a fact that when i tell ppl (except anu) that i did a certain thing, they raise their eyebrows n stuff. blah. in short its all good. PRIYA'S HERE!
AM GOING WITH her!!
cya

Its mehak birthday today.. u know how u feel so strongly for someone.. u know, when u have a gushing love for someone, like the one i talked abt in my last blog, i feel that way abt certain friends, like pingu, aditi, aneesa, saumia, swati, anu etc.. okay that statement shouldve had more enthusiasm in it.. i feel soo... blah. the day started with priya telling me how she stayed out the whole night with a guy "she's getting to know".. n then as usual me n aditi has our sympathetic (for each other n ourselves) talk...

Isnt it time for us to be letting our hair down n having fun.. okay i know i have issues with my defination of fun n u know, popularity.. but then i okay witht he whole popularity thing, i know that'll get sorted out once i start living on my own i.e- in 2 yrs.. im gonna make sure i can.. but as of now, im stuck here.. n even know i can totally understand why my parents have given me a 7 or max 8 pm curfew, sometimes i do wish things were a little different. im tired of being the only one without a proper group of friends, n why i meant proper is because sometimes when u do have male friends u have easy access to a car n conveyance isnt the primary issue. i mean, u know the liberty to be able to go out to party on weekends, to a close by bar or just for a cup of coffee.. n the reason why this thing becomes an ANNUAL (sob) affair is because not only me but even my circle of friends dont use that liberty.. okay, i will admitt, i love the way my life is right now, im given possible liberty, u know house parties n sleep overs n stuff, n most of the times i can understand wh parents r sceptical abt sending me places but i wish delhi in itself was safer im sure these restrictions wouldnt even exist..

anyway, now that ive vented out, i feel better.. im going to go with one consolation.. im going to believe that there will be a time for me to do all of it... okay im in a hurry, so i'll do the 10 things i hate thing in the ext blog..
adois!