Fluid thoughts from my brain

How dare she? She's not nearly as talented as I am. I would prove it to you - but I know i'd come off as trying too hard. But her! No. Nononononono. She's pretty alright. You just think she's talented and artistic because you don't know me well enough.

How dare he? He's fucking 26; a child. How can he want to be married to me? How can he be a good person, but a retarded psycho in the same breath? How dare he create a divide - how dare he discard? How dare he insinuate that I am complex? How dare I let myself open up to him?

Why must everything be buried if I throw a handful of mud on the situation? Surely the handful couldn't cover such a vast area? Why must we completely walk away if we decide to cut the chord? Why can't we cut it only to stick it back with pseudo-permanent glue later on and pretend that nothing went wrong? Of course, we wouldn't repeat the same mistakes - that's what life's about right?

Everything's melting, like in the 3rd movement of Moonlight Sonata. I like melted stuff. You can always freeze it later, and restore the balance.

Right?

It was noon already.

As I walked out of the door, I had no idea what was going to hit me.

I'm going to kill myself, at this rate.

Below are the things that overambitious me wants to do. Like, in the near future, hopefully.
(Apart from successfully pulling off referring to oneself in third person, that is)

1. Be a part of a fusion band - do the whole unique covers thingamajig, hopefully impress the peoples with my feeble voice and just sing again, really.

2. Head a magazine - work against deadlines, basically. Work for 14 hours a day; live, breathe and dedicate all energies to publishing an eccentric, obscure compilation of the writings of young writers.

3. Publish my writing - This is mainly fiction; I don't really have an opinion on real things.

4. Open a performing arts school - You know, on the lines of Dil Toh Pagal Hai - like, be super cool with our Pepsi cans and electronic cars because performing arts just pays that much!
No seriously, all for the pursuit of passing on the beauty of performance.

5. Travel - Yes, me too! I want to do Spain, Italy, Slovenia, Poland, Lebanon, Bali and all of India, of course. I want to be a super-budgeted traveler, doing small jobs alongside to fund my routes. So technically, this might take me a couple of years, but hey, what the heck, who's greying anyway?

6. Start my own cafe - It'll be themed, and I haven't thought of that yet but the basic idea is NOT to make it super fancy. Just some feel good food, and make it look like an extension of your living room.
(This does not apply if you live in a matchbox in Mumbai, like I did. You wouldn't have a living room anyway)
You could bring a book along, and request for your own music. There'd be booths for those of you who want to watch a movie along with your brunch/dinner, and a DVD library. Very colorful, brick-y and quaint. Atleast, that's the plan.

7. Teach - It doesn't even have to be a a subject, but just the idea of talking to young aspirational minds and knowing that you could mould it.

Any ideas on how to get started?

Oh, you can check that off the list now.